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What your Sleep Positions say about Your Relationship

What your Sleep Positions say about Your Relationship
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We all sleep, but do you know that the way you sleep, your sleep positions and your sleeping habits tell a lot about your relationship? Who you are as an individual?

Imagine yourself in bed, about to sleep. What position are you in with your partner?

Are you cuddling?

On opposite sides of the mattress?

So entangled that it’s hard to breathe?

The way you sleep can be a way to say, “I love you” “I trust you,” or, “I depend upon you.”

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For example, if you sleep on your back, it means you are strong, silent type; and if you sleep on your stomach, it characteristically means you have an open, outgoing, and playful personality.

So, what happens when your sleep positions differ in one bed?

It’s actually fascinating.

While you are soundly sleeping, your subconscious mind takes over and commands your body. But your sleep positions reveal how you feel about your partner and yourself. According to relationship psychologist Corrine Sweet, “During sleep, you cannot fake your body language. This is the time when you are honest, vulnerable and your sleeping position can reveal a lot about your relationship.”

“Because your subconscious mind controls the way you sleep with your partner, sleep body language can be an amazingly accurate way to assess what’s going on in your relationship — even if you can’t or don’t articulate those things while you’re awake”, says Patti Wood, a body language expert with more than 30 years of experience and author of Success Signals, A Guide to Reading Body Language.

So have a look at these sleep positions to get a clue to your relationship with your partner.

Table of Contents

11 Sleep Positions that tell about your Relationship

Here, we have collected information from scientists, psychologists, therapists and relationship counselors to interpret what 11 different partner sleep positions mean.

1. The Spoon

the-spoon sleep positions

Image Credits: Indiatimes.com

Spoon is one of the most common sleep positions among couples in the first few years of a relationship or marriage. This is indicative of trust and an intimate level of comfortableness. This position is when one bed mate curves his or her body around the backside of the other person and they’re virtually touching from top to bottom. The Spoon provides the maximum contact with your partner, ensuring physical closeness. It’s not necessarily erotic, instead, it’s “a comforting, safe cocoon,” says Shirley P. Glass, psychologist and martial therapist.

What it means: I trust you

2. The Loose Spoon

the-loose-spoon sleep positions

In loose spooning your partner is still very protective about you, but at the same time also wants to sleep more comfortably. So in this position there is a slight gap between the bodies instead of that intense coverage. The couple remains close in this position by touching hands, feet or knees. This position comes later in a relationship, usually five or six years into it, Wood explains. New couples tend to have the most physical contact in bed, but when the novelty of bed-sharing wears off, it’s common to revert to the positions that make you feel most comfortable and produce the best quality sleep, says Paul Rosenblatt, author of Two in a Bed: The Social System of Couple Bed Sharing.

What it means: I’ve got your back

3. The Chasing Spoon

Chasing-spoon sleep positions

Image Credits: Expertrain

Though it may look like a standard Spoon, the Chasing Spoon is usually a little lopsided: one person has moved away from the center of the bed, and the other ‘chases’ to physically reconnect. According to Sleep Positions: The Night Language of the Body, the Chasing Spoon could simply mean that one partner wants more space in the bed. The other less literal interpretation is that the partner doing the drifting wants to be pursued.

What it means: I am very possessive about you

4. The Unraveling Knot

Couple Sleeping on Opposite Sides of Bed sleep positions

Here, couples start out in the intimate position, but once they are relaxed and slip into a slumber, they unravel their limbs. It actually shows signs of a strong relationship, one where the couple begins together, but then confidently stretches out into their own space. Dr. Sweet says it’s a “compromise between intimacy and independence, allowing for the best of both worlds,” though only about 8% of couples favour this position.

What it means: I love you but I also love my sleep.

5. The Royal Hug

the-royal-hug sleep positions

Image Credits: ScoopPick.com

This sweet face-up sleeping position indicates confidence and self-assurance. The woman usually rests her head on the man’s chest or shoulder. Wood says that the person on his or her back while sleeping is “facing life.” If the man has his arms wrapped around the woman, it shows protectiveness. But if his hands are on top of his head like a crown or his elbows are out to the side like a royal cape, he’s not only showing his confidence, but indicating that he wants to be in charge.

If the woman is sleeping facing her partner in the fetal position, she’s subconsciously showing that she depends upon him and allows him to be in charge. Resting her head on his chest, but stretching out her body shows she wants to make decisions herself. In short, this sleep position reaffirms trust and confidence.

What it means: I am powerful to protect you. OR I depend on you

6. The Leg Hug

the-leg-hug sleep positions

This is a position where only the legs of the couple touch and usually are intertwined or gently resting upon each other. This is a position that reveals an extreme level of comfortableness with each other, where a couple has been together for a long time.  According to Wood, if your partner plays footsie with you in bed, or intertwines their legs with yours, it means they crave an emotional or sexual connection.

A pair of tangled legs is also a sign that the two of you can’t get enough of each other — even when you’re sleeping. “It means your lives are intertwined, that you function as a pair. You probably finish each other’s sentences and take care of each other,” Wood said.

What it means: I need you

7. The Back Kisser

the-back-kisser sleep positions

Image Credits: Fadufeed

This position suggests you’re a confident couple that appreciates your own space. The facing away from each other hints at the ability and desire to be independent, while the butt touch shows you still want to stay sexually connected, Wood says. Chances are you’re a new couple who doesn’t yet have a reason for distrust OR have been together for a while, and are relaxed and comfortable with one another.

What it means: I love you and I love my space

8. The Liberty Lovers

the-liberty-lovers sleep positions

Image Credits: ExploreLifeStyle

Another position which is more common with established couples is the Liberty Lovers – sleep back-to-back, but with space between them. So if you and your partner sleep facing opposite directions with space in-between ­– don’t fret! This is actually a good thing. Despite facing opposite directions and not touching, this position indicates that you are connected and secure. You can be close without touching, sharing a bed but independent. You’re the kind of couple that’s OK doing things alone, but can’t wait to be back together to share stories and recount your day. According to the study, 27% of couples prefer this sleeping style.

What it means: I am close to you

9. The Tangle

the-tangle-position sleep positions

Ah, young love! If you favour the Tangle, chances are you are in a fairly new relationship and can’t bear to be separated. It’s an incredibly intimate position that means you can’t get enough of each other. It tends to happen when there is either intense emotions at play (like after lovemaking) or at the start of a romantic relationship. Some couples maintain it throughout their relationship but it isn’t a good thing. It shows that you are too dependent on each other to sleep apart.

What it means: I can’t get enough of you

10. The Stomach Snoozer

the-stomach-snoozer sleep positions

A couple that sleeps on their stomachs might want to think about having a conversation. Sleeping face-down protects the front of the body. The Stomach Snoozer position indicates signs of anxiety, emotional fear, vulnerability and lack of sexual trust. The best solution is to talk it out and cosy up.

What it means: I don’t want to face it. OR I am very anxious

11. The Space Hog

the-space-hog-position sleep positions

If your partner spreads out with little regard to where you are in the bed, it might is time to question the relationship. The Space Hog, as the name indicates, spreads him or herself out in bed, taking up all the space and is selfish and has little regard for your needs. If one partner dominates the bed, it means he or she also dominates the relationship, relegating the partner to a secondary, submissive role.

What it means: I am powerful

What looks closest to the way you cuddle up or don’t cuddle up at night?


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